Ah-hmmm.
Merry Christmas!!!
Christmas is a time for cheer, a time for hope, a time for tradition. Some traditions, like caroling, giving to the poor and decorating the Christmas Tree are age-old standbys people the world over practice during this special season. Other traditions are more personal, like my Aunt Katy's fig pinwheel cookies made from a recipe stretching back through generations of my family. Even ESS observes a few Christmas traditions in order to bring the spirit of Christmas into our cold, drafty hallways.
"Uh, Stephen, maybe can I ask you something?"
"Yes, Mrs. Nam, of course."
"OK, OK. Are you sure?" I hate it when she asks me that.
"Yes, I'm sure."
"Uh, maybe every year the native teachers I have dress up as Santa Claus."
Do WHAT!?!
"Oh, and please go into the classes like that, too."
Mine and Gavin's Santa outfits were a big hit with the kids. I added the cheesy Elvis sunglasses and sideburns and got rave reviews from my students, who proceeded to relieve me of my accuitriments and try them on for size.
My Advanced 2 class spent the better part of their reading day staging a Santa lookalike contest. How could I stop them? In the back of my head I knew the Korean teacher would subject them to joyless chanting of the same three pages of Amelia Bedelia over and over again for forty-five minutes. Have your fun. Gerry Christmas.
My impression of the children I teach is that they grow up in a fairly rigid social structure spelled out and hammered into them from an early age. When the Korean teachers give instruction, the children are perfect little angels: Obedient, quiet, attentive. They give absolute respect to their Korean teachers just as their social framework prescribes. I obviously don't fit into the social framework.
Somebody needs to add the word "all" in front of "teachers" because the respect given to the Korean teachers leaves the classroom when they do. Any respect I want from the children I have to earn. This usually entails a combination of discipline, dedication and a fair amount of entertainment. Yes, I am an entertainer. It's important to keep in mind that many, of not most of them are not terribly interested in learning English. They didn't come to ESS by any road they themselves selected. They're here so they're parents can forget about them for another hour and a half. This isn't school, these grades don't matter. For the kids who understand this concept, ESS is party time. The implied threat is clear: Entertain me or I'll entertain myself (and drive you nuts in the process).
It's amazing how good I am at fulfilling my end of the bargain. I can dance. I can sing. I could pantomime War and Peace. My Smeagol impression is tops and I draw a mean stick-figure. I've brought in sock puppets, Elvis costumes (see Holloween post) and music, but nothing has quite as mesmerizing an effect on the children as the chun-un monkey.
During his long sojurns through the endless passageways of Nampo-dong, Gavin made two critical discoveries crucial to keeping a group of highly-volatile Korean children from lapsing into utter chaos. First, he discovered the Korean dollar store, and within that cheap-crap respository he found the simple, elegant, made-in-china chun-un monkey.
Exhibit A:
Note the looks of bemusement on the children's faces. For less than a US dollar you can take this fuzzy stuffed hominid home with you. The sight of it whips a class into a highly-focused frenzy: They all want to touch the monkey (OK, please get your head out of the gutter). If the reaction is not brought under control quickly, this frenzy can spin out of control; however, the monkey (which ignited the reaction) can also be used to bring it under control. By simply making possession of the treasured monkey contingent upon being well-behaved, the children become as docile as Welsh sheep.
Gavin is a genius.
For all of you teachers in Korea, go out and buy a chun-un monkey. You won't regret it.
OK, that is the end of part 1 of the Holiday SoKoNotes. For those of you who have an audio player, checkout
http://homepage.mac.com/fotonotes/FileSharing1.html
and listen to your favorite blogger sing Jingle Bells...In Korean.
Part 2 tomorrow. Don't forget. Peace. --S
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